


Nine Months

by shamelessfiction (shamelssfiction)



Category: Glee
Genre: Adoption, Children, F/F, Family, Foster Care
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-07
Updated: 2012-06-07
Packaged: 2017-11-07 04:31:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/426934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shamelssfiction/pseuds/shamelessfiction
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Brittany and Quinn have made a beautiful life for themselves. They're ready to start a family. But it doesn't happen exactly how they expected.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nine Months

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first Quitt story. I've been wanting to do a story about foster adoption for a while now, and I realized Britt and Quinn were the couple that actually were most likely to be open to parenting in that way. I really grew to love this family as I wrote the story. I hope you enjoy them too.

Nine Months

Quinn turns right off of Whitney, on to Haverford.  She feels the car rock a bit on the turn and checks her speed.  It’s  only about  a fifteen minute drive from the office to the house, but it’s 8pm, the end of another 12 hour day, and she is eager to get home -  doing 40 in a 25.

In just a few more minutes, the house comes into view.  The high, pointed red roof and exposed beams make it stand out on a block of more traditional split levels.  Brittany calls it a fairy tale house. Quinn smiles at the thought as she pulls into the driveway. They only moved in about a year ago, but it’s pretty obvious that happily ever after is here already.

Brittany graduated from her DPT program last year.  She’s earned a lot of attention for a clinical project she developed with a faculty member at Quinnipiac, combining dance and yoga with traditional physical therapy. Having had her own experiences with the pain and frustration of physical rehabilitation, Quinn is always amazed at the magic Brittany can work with her patients.

Brittany always shrugs. “It’s not magic, Quinn. It’s science.”

And then she starts talking about kinesiology and neuroscience and Quinn downright swoons when Brittany says sexy words like orthopedic biomechanics.

Quinn has made her bonus at the firm for two years running, and she’s on track to make partner in another three or four years. She likes the money, but she loves making sure that families are safe; she’s carved out a spot for herself as a specialist on GLBT family law.

“You’re a hero, Quinn.”

Brittany squeezes her so hard every time a card comes with a picture of a smiling baby and a long note full of effusive thanks for Quinn’s help with the adoption .

Quinn always tries to protest, but Brittany always ignores her.

“You’re my hero, Quinn.”

And Quinn would try to shake her head no again, but by that time, they’re usually kissing.

Quinn cuts the engine and twists in the driver’s seat to grab her briefcase and a couple of fat file folders from the back. It’s 4th of July weekend, but she’ll be working over the holiday. At least it’s research she can do at home. Hours of reading are always more bearable when Brittany is there to break up the monotony. No one at the office makes Quinn iced coffee with chocolate syrup in it when her eyes are about to cross with fatigue. No one at the office delivers the coffee wearing short shorts and see though tank tops either.

The mental image makes Quinn pick up her pace. It’s been a long week, and with Brittany working early mornings at the practice, and Quinn staying late at the firm, they haven’t gotten nearly enough quality time together.

Quinn pushes through the front door, eager to rectify that situation as soon as possible.

But as soon as she sees Brittany, Quinn’s lascivious thoughts are pushed to the back of her mind.

Brittany is sitting cross legged on the couch in baggy gray sweats and a thin camisole tank top. No makeup, hair up in a messy ponytail and she looks gorgeous, as always. But her face is blotchy in the way Quinn knows means she’s been crying, and she’s staring down at the phone in her hand in disbelief.

Quinn drops her briefcase and folders on the hall table and rushes to Brittany’s side.

“Britt?” Quinn kneels before Brittany, to be sure she’s in her sightline. “Baby? Are you ok? Your dad…?”

Brittany’s father has been battling aggressive cancer for almost 8 months now. The prognosis wasn’t good at first, but he’s been hanging in there, fighting hard. A month of pretty good news had them all breathing a sigh of relief. But now, Quinn’s heart pounds. She remembers the last time they were in Lima, and Kenny had hugged her tight. “ _I know you take good care of my girl_.”

“Britt?...” Quinn’s mouth is dry.

Brittany blinks, her gaze clears and now she’s really looking at Quinn.

“Quinn?” Brittany registers the panic in Quinn’s eyes. She takes Quinn’s face in her hands.  “Oh, sweetie. No. No. Daddy’s ok. “

“Thank God.” Quinn breathes a sigh of relief, and drops her head onto Brittany’s lap. Automatically, Brittany runs her fingers through Quinn’s fine blonde hair.

There’s a moment of quiet.

“Hey baby. I missed you.” Quinn murmurs into Brittany’s knee cap.

“I missed you too.” Brittany leans forward to drop a kiss on Quinn’s temple.

After a few more seconds, Quinn gets up off the floor and drops onto the couch next to Brittany. Brittany squirms around so her legs are tucked under her, and her head is nestled on Quinn’s shoulder.

“What’s wrong though, Britt?”

Brittany lets out a sad, soft sigh. “Kendra.”

“Oh…”

Kendra is Brittany’s cousin - Kenny’s brother’s only child. When Kenny’s younger brother Chris had died young in a motorcycle accident, Kenny had tried to look out for the girl. But Kendra’s mother called Brittany’s working class family trash, and kept Kendra as far as possible from the Pierces.

 Quinn doesn’t know much about her, but she has heard over the years that Kendra is a single mother who has been in and out of treatment for addiction. Her two young children have been in and out of foster care. Once they heard what was going on, Brittany’s parents took the kids for a while last summer, before Kenny got so sick.

“What happened?” Quinn asks, quietly. She expects an overdose.

“Car accident.” Brittany sniffles into the shoulder of Quinn’s button down shirt. “Drunk driving. Or…high. Or whatever.” Brittany’s voice picks up a hard edge as the sentence went on. She’s furious.

“The kids…” Quinn hesitates, too horrified to finish the sentence.

“They’re ok.”

Quinn has never met these children, but she heaves a massive sigh of relief, nonetheless.

 “I guess she used to leave them with the neighbor lady for a couple of nights at a time. They were there for four days this time before the woman started wondering if Kendra was ever coming back. When she couldn’t get a hold of her, she eventually started calling hospitals…they found her in ICU at St. Rita’s.”

“Is she going to…”

“Mom says she’ll probably only make it a few more days.”

“Shit...” Quinn holds Brittany close. She works her fingertips down Brittany’s back, touching delicately at the ridge of her spine.

Brittany snuggles in closer and brings her hands up to toy with the crisp collar of Quinn’s shirt, resting her slim fingers on the rill of Quinn’s collarbone.

They sat that way for more than a half hour; Dusk fades into darkness around them.

Outside, the streetlamps cycle on. A dim light seeps through gaps in the curtains, glints off the glass of the picture frames on the mantle. Quinn’s eyes scan the years. Graduations. Vacations. The wedding. Then, off to the side, a big framed school picture, faithfully replaced with a new one each year.

Beth.

She’s 12 now, doing well at a top notch private school in Manhattan.  Shelby has been honest with her about her birth parents. Quinn and Puck get school pictures, they send birthday cards. Puck takes Beth out for dinner every time his band books a gig in New York. Quinn stays further away, but Brittany convinces her it’s ok to take Shelby up on the offer to join them for ice skating or shopping or a trip to the zoo every once in a while. 

Brittany speaks again.

“Mom is worried about the kids.”

Quinn keeps her gaze on the picture of Beth. Beth’s shoulders are slim, her eyes wide. She’s still a little girl, but not for long.

She’ll take them, of course.” Brittany continues. “But with Dad so sick…it’s just hard to…but…they don’t have anyone else.”

Quinn has only seen blurry pictures of these children. A boy, maybe three or four, and a younger girl, maybe a little older than a year. She has a vague inkling that their names are Aidan and Mattie.

With Brittany’s heart beating hard against her own, Quinn can only think of one thing to say.

“Well. Now they’ve got us.”

 

*****

 

“You realize this is crazy, right?”

Quinn and Santana are setting the picnic table in the back yard, and as always, it’s nearly impossible to keep the table cloth weighted down properly. A gust of wind blows by, flipping the plastic covering up into Quinn’s face.

Santana drives out from the city to visit them a few times a year now. There were awkward geometries among the three of them when Brittany and Quinn started dating after college. But after six years, they’ve all settled into new, smoother patterns. And when strange old feelings come up, Santana just looks the other way, swallows hard, drives home fast and finds a cold drink and a hot girl as soon as she gets back to the city. That hardly happens at all anymore though.

If anything, she’s proud of Brittany, for making the right choices for herself. If anything, she’s glad it’s Quinn.

“It’s…not what we were planning.” Quinn concedes, plunking a glass down, pinning the table cloth flat.

They hadn’t really been planning anything. More like planning to plan something, now that they were both done with school and settled with work and with the house. Quinn had ordered a book online, “The Lesbian Guide to Conception, Pregnancy and Birth.”

It had been on back order, and she had forgotten about it in the midst of planning a trip to Lima for Kendra’s funeral.

They had gone to Lima for a week, and  on the very the very first day Quinn noticed that Aidan’s hair was exactly the same shade of blonde as Brittany’s had been in high school, and that Mattie sucked her fingers when she was tired, just like Beth used to do. Brittany had watched Aidan follow Quinn around, trying to impress her with his knowledge of construction vehicles and watched Quinn crawl on the floor to build a monster-mega-dig zone with him, whatever that was.  Brittany was the one to finally figure out that it was strawberries that were giving Mattie hives.

“I wish you girls lived closer.” Barb was washing up after lunch. “I know you have a good life out there in Connecticut, but…it’s been rough going lately.”

“Mama…” Brittany started.

“I’m not trying to guilt you, don’t misunderstand.”

“Mama…” Brittany tried again.

“It’s just nice to have you here to talk to…And Quinn’s so good with him. He just squirms and whines and throws things with me. Your father has better luck, but he’s so tired…”

“Mama.” Brittany said firmly and took the last plate from her mother’s hands. She leaned down and put it in the dishwasher. “Quinn and I were talking on the way over here, and maybe we can help…maybe they can come stay with us for a while.”

Brittany’s mother tilted her head and regarded her daughter.

“Brittany, baby, that’s serious business.” Barb said after a minute. “You have a happy marriage. Bringing someone else’s kids into it…might not keep it that way.”

Brittany thought of the way Quinn had twined their fingers together on the airplane arm rest, the way Quinn took her hand every day, anywhere, protective, gentle, strong.

“Don’t worry about us, Mama.”

Quinn and Brittany had put the kids to bed together that night, squeezing into Brittany’s sister’s bed with the Aidan, Mattie, a ton of stuffed animals, and three Doctor Seuss books. Aidan showed off for them, pointing out all the letters and colors and numbers he knew. Mattie snuggled into Brittany’s chest, and reached out a chubby little hand to pat Quinn’s smooth hair.

Once the kids had drifted off, Quinn and Brittany had placed Mattie in her Pack-N-Play, propped pillows around Aidan to be sure he wouldn’t roll off the bed, and went to lay together in Brittany’s old twin bed, holding hands, not saying anything. After about 20 minutes of quiet, they turned and kissed each other long and hard.

Quinn said “Britt, I definitely think we should.” And Brittany said “Quinn, I really want to.”

And they kissed and whispered “Yes?” and “Really?” against each other’s skin until Aidan pushed open the door to Brittany’s bedroom and came in, rubbing his eyes.

He stood at the foot of the bed. “My mom died.”

His voice was small, his chin gathered into a pout that threatened imminent tears.

Brittany sat up and reached out to him. He took her hand and clambered up onto the bed.

“I know, sweetie,” she said, rubbing his back and drawing him closer.

Aidan turned to Quinn. “Did you know too?”

Quinn nodded, and scooted onto her side so the little boy could lie between her and Brittany.

He burrowed down between them, sobbed hard for a solid half hour, smearing his snot and tears on Brittany’s tank top and Quinn’s t-shirt before falling into a deep sleep.

Quinn spent the rest of the week on the phone with the children’s law guardian, and down at the courthouse, trying to figure out Aidan and Mattie’s legal status.

Back in Connecticut the next week, when A Guide to Lesbian Conception, Pregnancy and Birth finally  came in the mail, Quinn had unwrapped it, looked at it curiously for a minute, then shrugged and slipped it into her bottom desk drawer and went back to reading all the case law she could find on interstate kinship adoption.

Santana is still talking. “But like, Kendra completely nuts, a total junkie meth head.” Santana gestures emphatically with a plastic plate. “What if these kids are all fu…”

“These kids are great.” Quinn sets the last glass down with a surprisingly loud thud and straightens up so she can look Santana in the eye. “These kids are sad and confused and angry, but they are beautiful and they are great. And Kendra was their mother. She was Brittany’s family. My family too, now. So you can either never talk like that about her again, or you can leave.”

Santana takes a step back, stunned. “I’m…sorry. I didn’t understand…”

“Well, that’s how it is.”

“Okay.” Santana sets the last plate down and finds she has to look away, swallow hard. “Okay.”

 

*****

 Aidan and Mattie are still in foster care, with Brittany’s parents as a kinship placement for the moment. Quinn manages to get Brittany identified as an adoptive resource by the state of Ohio, but Ohio isn’t particularly evolved when it comes to recognizing same-sex marriages, and it doesn’t allow second parent adoption. So what Quinn really wants is to get the kids’ case transferred to Connecticut, so Aidanand Mattie can be placed with them, at home, and they can try to move through to adoption under the better protections that Connecticut offers their family. It’s taking a lot of favors and even more wheedling, but things are slowly but surely getting done.

In the meantime, Quinn and Brittany complete training as foster parents, and get their home study done.

“You have a beautiful home.” The case worker says when she comes to inspect the house.

Mattie and Aidan are visiting for the week, giving Barb and Kenny a much needed break. Aidan chooses that moment to run in from the yard shouting, holding up something long and slimy, covered in mud.

Britty, Britty, is this a kind of snake?”

His shouts wake Mattie from her nap. Her wails come through the monitor loud and clear.

“It used to be quieter.” Brittany grins at the case worker.

 

*****

It’s almost Thanksgiving by the time Aidan and Mattie’s cases are transferred to the state of Connecticut.

Kenny is feeling good, so he and Barb pack up the car and drive the kids to Connecticut. They’ll all spend the holiday together, and then Aidan and Mattie will stay with Quinn and Brittany.

“Unken?” Aidan goes too fast to bother saying Uncle Kenny all the way through. “Unken, you know I’m gonna have my whole own room now?”

In the driver’s seat, Kenny nods. It’s the thirteenth time Aidan has informed him of this in the past 40 miles.

When the kids went to Connecticut in October, the big event was a trip to Ikea. Aidan picked out a comforter set at with bright red, yellow and blue cars and trucks driving across its width.

Mattie got to pick her linens too. Quinn held up two options, both pastels, and knelt down in front of the carriage.

“Ok, Matt. Pick, baby. You choose.”

Brittany smiled down at them, rocking the carriage with her right hand even while she was reaching out to grab Aidan’s collar with her left, to drag him back from wandering into the next aisle.

Mattie batted at both of the packages before her.

“You want the bunnies, baby? Or the…” Quinn glanced quizzically at the sheets she was holding. “Is that a beet?”

 “BEET!” Mattie shouted, happily.

“Beet?” Quinn confirmed, holding out the sheets with vegetables dancing across them.

“BEET!” Mattie squealed, and clutched the package to her chest.

Brittany giggled. “I love this kid.”

 Aidan was still trying to squirm out of her grasp. She whirled on him and swept him up into her arms, tickling his tummy where his shirt rode up.

“I love this one too.”

Aidan laughed, “Put me down Britty!” But really he clung to her neck, and didn’t want to get down. Brittany wrapped an arm around him and settled him on her hip.

An old woman passing by patted Quinn on the shoulder. Quinn stood up, readying an apology for all the noise.

But instead the woman said, “What a sweet family.”

Quinn blushed. “Thank you.”

“You mind your mommies, young man.” The woman wagged a finger in Aidan’s direction, smiling.

Brittany and Quinn exchanged a glance. It was the first time anyone had said it.

But Aidan just nodded “Okay.”

“Oh…kay.” Quinn let out a huge sigh as the woman strolled on.

“Okay.” Brittany bumped Quinn with her hip.

“BEET!” Mattie added, thoughtfully.

 Over the past month, Brittany painted Aidan’s room cream, with blue accents, and Mattie’s cream with rose accents. Quinn has gone on a book buying binge. The shelves are stocked with Richard Scarry and Mo Willems and Berenstein Bears and Pat the Bunny.

“See Unken?” Aidan drags Kenny upstairs to his new room as soon as they walk into the house. “See? I’m gonna stay here now.”

“I see buddy.” Kenny ruffles Aidan’s hair. In his excitement, Aidan’s blue eyes seem a shade darker. Kenny is surprised by how much Aidan looks like Chris. Kenny feels a sudden sharp pang of loss for his kid brother, the grandfather Aidan never met.

 

*****

Visits are one thing and real life is another and some time around the third week, real life sets in.

It’s the week before Christmas and Target is mobbed. They would have avoided it, but Quinn thought Brittany had picked up the diapers  and Quinn thought Brittany had, and they found themselves staring at the empty diaper box when Brittany went to get Mattie changed after her afternoon nap.  So a Saturday evening trip to Target it is.

Soon, they’ll learn that errands are more efficiently done by one grown up, alone. But right now, they like being a family. They like the noise and bustle of buckling everyone into the car. They like having their seats kicked by little feet from the back seat.

But here in Aisle 14 the charm is quickly fading.

“I want a truuuuuuuck.” Aidan whines, hanging on Brittany’s arm. Quinn and Mattie are still back in the diaper aisle. Brittany thought taking Aidan  to look at the toys might distract him from his complaints that the store is too hot, too boring. But it seems to have had the opposite effect.

“Aidan, we’re just here to get diapers. You’ll get plenty of presents from Santa Claus, next week.”

Brittany knows for a fact that there are five massive Tonka trucks, yet to be wrapped, cluttering up the back of her closet right now.

“I want a truck NOW.” Aidan’s whine is quickly approaching a wail.

“Aidan.” Brittany’s voice is warning, but still calm. “You have plenty of trucks at home to play with.  Now come here and calm down, or you won’t get your turn on the Advent calendar tonight.

He loves opening the tiny doors to find a miniature toy or tiny piece of chocolate.

But tonight, not even the lure of the Advent calendar is strong enough to distract Aidan from the tantrum he’s driving toward.

“You don’t even care about me or help me or get me ANYTHING.” Brittany goes to reach for him. Aidan tries to duck out of her grasp. “NO. You’re not my REAL mom.” He wrenches her arm away. “You don’t care about me. You don’t. You DON’T. YOU DON’T!” Now he’s kicking and thrashing and hitting her. Brittany finds it tough to find a place to hold on to him.

Quinn comes running with the cart and Mattie when she hears the shrieks.

“Want me to…” Quinn has no real idea what kind of help she is supposed to be offering.

Brittany shakes her head and sets her mouth in a grim line. “You finish up. We’ll be in the car.”

Aidan is strong, but Brittany is much, much stronger. She gathers him up, still thrashing. Somewhere between Aisle 14 and the parking lot, he gets in a bite on her wrist. But by the time they reach the car, he’s a little sobbed out.

Brittany opens the passenger side door and sits him in the passenger seat.

“You broke our number one house rule – no hurting yourself or anyone else.  Three minute time out, kiddo.”

Aidan lands a few fierce kicks on the dashboard and knocks his head back against the passenger seat, hard. Brittany ignores him and sets the timer on her phone.

“Three minutes,” she repeats, and sets the timer where Aidan can watch it count down.

She turns away, but keeps her body between him and the parking lot. 

In one minute, he stops kicking and fidgeting. In two the high red color has faded from his cheeks. But the last 15 seconds, he’s sniffling, and trying to catch Brittany’s eye. She ignores him until the buzzer rings.

As soon as it does, his arms are around her waist, pulling her close.

“Britty,I’m sorry I hurt you. Really really.” He pauses. “Can we have time in now?”

“Thank you for your apology. And sure we can.” Brittany climbs into the car and settles Aidan on her lap, closing the door behind her. It’s quiet now, just the two of them shut off from the sounds of the parking lot.

She bends to whisper into his ear. “Ok, baby. Time in.”

He squirms around in her arms until she’s holding him like an infant. He shoves a few fingers in his mouth and rubs his cheek against her sweater.

“Aidan?”

He nods.

“It’s true, I’m not the mama you started out with. We all know that.”

He hides his face in Brittany’s armpit.

“And it’s ok to miss Kendra. You can always love her and think about her. We can talk about her.”

He’s silent, and Brittany just holds him, rocking him slowly. She checks the rear view mirror, but Quinn isn’t out of the store yet. Those lines at checkout were heinous.

Aidan puts one foot on the side of the driver’s seat and pushes, but not hard.

“Why’d she have to get dead though?” Aidan’s voice is soft.

Brittany tries not to tear up, even while she’s frantically trying to think of something to say.

But Aidan keeps talking. “And why didn’t she stay with us, before? You and Quinn…” He has to stop to catch his breath. “You always stay with us and help us. But sometimes she used to just GO…”

Brittany takes a deep breath and reminds herself of her work. Pain is information. Pick through it. Learn.

“Aidan…” Brittany sits him on her lap, so his back is to the windshield and he’s facing her. “I don’t know why things happen the way they do. No one does, kiddo. All we can do is focus on what we do know. I know Quinn and I love you and we love Mattie. I know that we will always stay with you. Remember we talked about what adoption means? And we read that book, about all the different kids who got adopted?”

Aidan’s eyes lit up, he likes knowing the answer.

“It means you get to be a family, forever and stay.”

Brittany nods. “How do you feel about that, if you stay with us forever?”

“I feel…” Aidan holds his hands a few inches apart. “Like, this much sad about it cause sometimes I miss my other mama.” Then he threw his arms wide. “But this much happy too.”

 Brittany smiles a bit, butts her head into Aidan’s tummy.

“We don’t want you to ever forget Kendra. She’ll always be your family. And we’ll always be your family now too. And everyone in the family follows the family rules.”

“Like no hurting.”

“Like no hurting.”

Aidan thinks for a minute, chewing his lip in a way that he definitely picked up from Quinn.

“That’s a good rule.”

 “Well, we thought so.”

“Umm…Britty?”

“Yes, kiddo?”

“Maybe sometimes I call you Mama, or sometimes Quinn or sometimes my other Mama, in my head. Ok?”

“Of course it’s okay, sweetie.”

Brittany hugs him tight. When she looks up, she can see Quinn coming across the parking lot with the baby and enough diapers to last them through to August.

“Hop in the back, Aidan. Our girls are here.”

He giggles as he squirms between the front seats, into his booster seat. 

“Quinn’s not a GIRL. She’s a mama. We just _said_.”

Britanny settles him in and clicks shut the buckles on his seat. Quinn opens the far door to settle Mattie into her car seat.

“Everything okay in here...?” Quinn asks, cautious.

“Everything is perfect in here...hot mama.”

Quinn raises a quizzical eyebrow, confused

But then Brittany leans over Mattie’s head to meet Quinn’s lips in a soft kiss, and everything makes perfect sense.

 

*****

Christmas is a blur of wrapping paper, happy shrieking and cookie crumbs.

Aidan gets plenty of toys, but also one big flat package.

“Is this clothes?” he asks, suspiciously.

Brittany shakes her head. “Come open it with us.”

He settles between Brittany and Quinn on the couch and opens the box.

“It’s a scrap book” Quinn explains. “We’re gonna put all your most important memories in here, so you never forget.”

He turns a page, curious. “There’s already stuff in here.”

“Well, you’re a big boy, there’s already lots you remember, right?...Mattie, get that out of your...Brittany, take that out of her mouth, please?”

Brittany gently pries a curl of wrapping ribbon from Mattie’s fist.

“Hey, that’s my old house!”

Brittany’s mother hadn’t found many photographs in what Kendra left behind, but she’d managed to dig up a few.

“Yep. And there’s your first mama, holding you when you were just a tiny baby.”

Quinn and Brittany aren’t sure what to expect, but as always, Aidan surprises them. He gets up and walks into the kitchen.

They brace for sobbing, wailing, the sound of crashing pots and pans. But instead he trots back into the living room in a few seconds, holding one of the Christmas portraits that they had tacked up on the fridge, the Brittany, Quinn, Mattie and Aidan all piled together on Santa’s lap.

He turns to a blank page and pats it down. “Mommy, can you glue that in for me?”

This time, he means Quinn.

*****

 

Santana comes for a visit in the New Year. When she steps on a Lego for the third time, she turns to Quinn, wincing in pain.

“You’re a better woman than I am, Quinn.”

She’s talking to Brittany on the landing when Mattie wakes up from her nap, wailing for her Mama.

Brittany ducks into the baby’s room, Santana trails behind.

“Oh, you’re all sweaty.” Brittany coos at the little girl in the crib. “C’mon, let’s get you into a new outfit.”

Brittany starts stripping the kid of her damp clothes.

Santana steps back. “I can go...”

“Don’t be silly, help me, get me a new shirt and pants for her. Second drawer in the...yeah.”

Santana passes over a pile of pink and white shirts and picks out a dark purple one, with a bright green alligator on the front. One drawer down, she finds a pair of black and purple striped leggings. She holds the outfit out gingerly toward Brittany.

But Brittany is busy with diapers and wipes and powders.

“Aw shit.”

“Santana!”

“Sorry. Sorry kid.” Santana calls over Brittany’s shoulder to Mattie.

Mattie waves. “Sa-taaa!”

“She likes you.”

“My fans _are_ legion.”

Brittany works quickly, Mattie is dressed again in no time.

“Hold her.” Brittany holds the baby out to Santana.

“I can’t. I...” Santana looks around for an out but the Raggedy Ann doll on the dresser isn’t any help at all.

“Hold her.” Brittany places the child firmly in Santana’s arms. The baby goes for Santana’s large hoop earrings right away.

Quinn comes in from the hall and leans in the doorway, smirking. Brittany comes close, Quinn wraps an arm around her waist and they watch Santana try to dodge Mattie’s chubby hands and slimy kisses for about two minutes.

“You smug married bitc... _ladies_...think you’re  really f... _freakin_ hilarious, don’t you?”

Quinn and Brittany laugh.

Santana turns to Mattie “Don’t they?” She jostles her up and down, settling her a little better on her hip. “Well, we’ll show them. I’m gonna be your favorite Auntie Tana. And teach you everything I know about shoplifting and sneaking out and how to get boys and how to get girls and...

Santana brushes past Quinn and Brittany, taking the baby downstairs with her.

“Can you say...Lima Heights, Mattie?”

 

*****

 

Late April and it’s their first night out alone in almost five months. But the adoption was finalized last week. It’s time for a celebration.

Mattie is already down for the night. Quinn worries that Aidan might fuss when they leave - he’s not great at goodbyes at daycare, he still works out some of his anger and separation anxiety with a play therapist. But as it turns out Aidan has quite a crush on the sitter, Abby ; he practically pushes Quinn and Brittany out the door.

“Bye Mamas. Go do your love stuff.”

“Can’t we get a goodbye kiss?” Brittany asks.

Aidan rolls his eyes at Abby.

Brittany is having none of that. She scoops up the little boy and peppers him with kisses.

“There. Some love stuff for you.”

Quinn adds a kiss on his forehead. “Be good, Aidey.”

“Byyyeee.”

They take Quinn’s car - she’s cleared out the juice boxes and board books and mounds of legal files for the occasion.

The car ride is so quiet, it almost makes Quinn nervous. Brittany senses her tension, slides her fingers over her wife’s hand.

“Remember how we used to dress up and go out for dinner all the time?”

Quinn nods, leans her head back against the headrest of her seat.

“Remember how we used to sleep until noon on Sundays?”

Brittany grins. “And have sex all afternoon after we woke up?”

Quinn pulls into the parking lot of the restaurant. The place is bustling but he’s got a good table, she made the reservation weeks ago. But she’s yawning already. The thought of even walking up to the maitre’d sounds exhausting.

“Hey. Baby?” Brittany brings Quinn’s hand to her mouth and places small kisses on the knuckles. “I know you made the reservation and all, but...”

“Britt, you read my mind. How about...”

“Pizza picnic?”

A half hour later they’re sneaking into Brooksvale Park with a blanket under Quinn’s arm, a bottle of wine tucked into her purse. Brittany is carrying a pizza, loaded with veggies on her side, bacon on Quinn’s.

They step quietly over the chains meant to keep out carousing teenagers. Quinn is usually firmly opposed to breaking the rules, but she’ll risk an awkward word or two with a park ranger for the chance at a moonlight picnic with her wife.

Anyway, they did this all through Brittany’s time in grad school and have never been caught yet. Quinn used to drive up from the office in New Haven, pick up Brittany after a late class, and they’d stop on the way home.

Quinn takes Brittany’s hand and leads her over the uneven ground, spurred on memories of starlit kisses.

Their usual spot isn’t too far from the road, a smooth semicircle of soft grass,  hidden from traffic by two large boulders.

Brittany spreads out the blanket, Quinn uncorks the wine. They forgot cups. Brittany sips right from the bottle.

“You’ve got...” Quinn gestures to a drop that’s making its way down Brittany’s chin.

Brittany catches some of it with the heel of her hand. Quinn leans in and kisses the rest off, sucking gently on Brittany’s bottom lip.

Brittany responds, tilting Quinn’s face up to meet hers and pressing into the kiss. She smiles against Quinn’s mouth, and Quinn grins back, wildly.

Quinn remembers being 16, pressing her back hard against the wall of someone’s finished basement, watching Brittany kiss people during a game of spin the bottle. Quinn’s heart had pounded, her jaw gone slack. She had worked hard to tear her gaze away. But that smile had kept her rooted to the spot.

For four years after that, she had wondered what it would be like to kiss Brittany, what it would be like to feel that burst of light right up against your skin. Kissing boys was nothing like that, so Quinn started trying girls, her freshman year at Yale. Closer, but not quite.

Brittany had come to Yale for spring break during junior year. They’d ended up at a Coop party, where a bunch of guys were setting up a circle for spin-the-bottle.

Brittany had grabbed Quinn’s hand, pulled her toward the group. “C’mon, let’s play. Those guys are hot.”

“Britt.” Quinn had squirmed away. “They’re all gay.”

“Some of them are probably bi.” Brittany had corrected. “And anyway, “ she had shrugged, “whatever, they’re all still cute. It’s just for fun.”

But Quinn had shaken her head and walked off to a corner.

Brittany had followed. “Quinn?”

Quinn stared at the ceiling, hoping that would keep the tears from coming. It half worked.

“Quinn? What’s wrong?”

“It’s stupid...” Quinn shook her head. “It’s just...you...” She gestured to Brittany’s body. “You’ve been here...sleeping in my bed...and...I...” Quinn stopped, took a breath, offered a weak smile. “Nothing. Really. It’s just stupid.”

And then Brittany had blinked at her, once, said a soft “Oh.” and leaned in and pressed her lips to Quinn’s.

The kiss wasn’t feverish, it wasn’t hurried. It was soft and slow and sweet, and exactly what Quinn had been waiting for for years.

Brittany’s hands came around from Quinn’s shoulders, tangled in her hair to pull her closer. And then she had smiled, her lips curving up as her nose nuzzled into Quinn’s cheek.

Quinn had imagined it would feel like sunlight - warm from the outside. But the burst of light and heat was inside her own chest, waves of warmth that loosened her limbs, made her skin tingle from the inside.

It’s still exactly like that, seven years later. Brittany is still a sunburst, driving the doubts out of Quinn’s heart.

“I love you.” Quinn says, running the tip of her nose across Brittany’s cheekbone. “I love you so much.”

Brittany murmurs love, soft and low. She disentangles herself for a moment, moves the wine bottle further away. Then she pulls Quinn down with her as she lies on the blanket, twining their limbs back together.

Brittany wants to kiss some more, but Quinn wants to talk.

“We have kids.”

“We DO?” Brittany pulls back, her eyes wide with mock shock.

Quinn swats at Brittany’s shoulder, laughing a little. Brittany wraps Quinn in her arms and rolls, pinning Quinn underneath her.

“We do.” She drops a kiss on Quinn’s nose. “You’re a superhero lawyer.” She kisses Quinn’s left cheek. “And I’m an awesome PT.” A quick flick of her tongue on Quinn’s left earlobe.” “And we have a fairy tale house, and one shitty car and one nice car, and...” Brittany dips down to Quinn’s mouth again, and it distracts her for a moment. But she catches her breath and continues. “And two beautiful, beautiful kids. And those kids are home, tucked in bed. And we are here. And you are...” She bends her head and sucks gently on Quinn’s neck, nips at the gentle hollow of her collarbone. “...gorgeous.”

Quinn realizes this is going to keep happening, forever. This light will keep shining in her chest for the rest of her life - Brittany’s kisses, Aidan’s smiles, Mattie’s toddling steps. They’re all sunlight, they’re all stars.

Quinn shifts under Brittany, canting her hips in a way she knows will make Brittany gasp.

“We made a family.”

“Oh, honey.” Brittany presses hard against Quinn, whispers soft and warm against her ear. “We’re just getting started.”

 

**The End**


End file.
